As parents/guardians and loved ones, you may be more likely to notice important changes in your student that could signal signs of distress. A suggestion from a parental/guardian or trusted family member can hold significant weight, so your recommendations regarding reaching out to resources for assistance can be very influential. Conversely, it will be important to accept that you won't know every detail of your student's life. The following information describes signs that can be indications of distress, suggestions on how to respond effectively when your student approaches you with problems, how to make an effective referral, and information about the Counseling Center's scope of practice.
Changes in Academic Performance
- Decline in academic performance
- Excessive absences from class
- Confusion or uncertainty about interest, abilities or values
Unusual Behavior
- Listlessness, lack of energy, complaints about fatigue
- Marked changes in personal hygiene
- Impaired speech or disjointed, confused thoughts
- Aggressive or threatening behavior
- Extreme mood changes or inappropriate displays of emotion
- Excessive crying
- Dramatic weight loss or gain
- Preoccupation with food or body image
- Bizarre behavior indicating a loss of contact with reality
Changes in Relationships
- Death of a family member or close friend
- Difficulties in romantic relationships
- Problems with family members, friends or roommates
- Extreme isolation
- Becoming too dependent on one relationship at the expense of previously important connections with others
References to Suicide
- Overt references to suicide
- Statements of hopelessness or helplessness
- Indications of prolonged unhappiness
- Pessimism about the future
How to respond
- Talk to your student as soon as you notice something unusual, don’t ignore atypical or disturbing behavior.
- Express your concern in a caring manner and indicate the specific behaviors that are causing you to be concerned.
- Use “I” language that focuses on what you have noticed or what you are feeling.
- Talk to your student in private when you both have enough time for a conversation.
- Listen attentively and avoid being critical or judgmental.
- Encourage positive action by helping your student define the problem and possible ways of handling it - AVOID THE TEMPTATION TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM FOR THEM.
- Ask directly how you can best help.
- Know your limits as a helper. Parents/guardians can do a lot, but sometimes professional help is needed.